My First Week Home...

My nurse and physical therapist visits begin.  The nurse comes in the morning to check my vitals to make sure that I am fit for Physical therapy.  Jim, the physical therapist, comes in the afternoon.  The first week, he gives me several balance exercises to do.  They don't seem like they should be that difficult, but my right side is still very weak and I don't do too well on them.  It's very frustrating, because l look at them and think, "I should be able to do this!".  Anytime I see someone, I make them do the exercises.  I guess I just need proof that someone else can do them and that this really is happening to me.  It's still hard to comprehend.

Jim evaluates my balance abilities based on the Tinneti Balance Scale.  A little walking, a little nudging to see if I will fall down and it ends with me still being a fall risk.  I figured.  I'm still needing the walker for a bit longer.

I like to practice my exercises in front of people.  It's funny to watch their faces when I start to tumble.  I feel like I'm a carnival act..."Step right up and watch the lady tumble..."  Usually my act ends with a "If you fall down, I'm going to beat you up." or "Will you please just sit down!  You are making me nervous."  Fine.  Y'all are no fun.

But, I keep working on my exercises and Jim comes back in a couple days.  Adds some new ones, and I'll tell you, they are wearing me out!  But I am improving a bit.  The best thing is that I have not fallen in awhile, and when I lose my balance, I have learned to catch myself.  Apparently, that is why I am doing therapy.  Not that it will get my balance back, if my cerebellum is permanently messed up, that won't happen.  But, if I can learn to deal with it and not fall down, that's OK.  If only I could drive....

I wish I could explain how difficult it is to try to learn to do easy things over again.  I have to really talk to my brain and basically will it to make my right food do things that should be easy.  Like standing on just my right foot and going up on my toes.  Not happening.  I stumble and can hardly do it while holding on to something.  And because I sometimes stick my tongue out when I really concentrate, I bite it a lot.

Good thing it's on the side I can't feel.